Kindling for the Heart Read online

  Sam closed her eyes and tugged at the back of her neck. “You’ll be fine. We’re at different points in our lives, Trish. I’m twelve years older than you. I need to get my shit together.”

  “You’re a successful lawyer making lots of money, Sam. We had lots of fun times. What more do you want?”

  “It’s not fun for me anymore, Trish.” Sam sat on the arm of the couch in an effort to calm Trish before her call with Jo was wrecked with another outburst. “I want something more out of life. Someone I can grow old with.”

  “Nobody wants to grow old.” Trish wiped her nose. “Why think about that, especially when I can help keep you feeling young?”

  “It’s time for me to mature and start acting my age. For God’s sake, I’m old enough to be Joanne’s mother.”

  “You weren’t the one sleeping with her, so that’s irrelevant.” Trish scooted closer to Sam. “She was obviously too young for me, especially since I prefer a more mature woman.”

  “I’ve met someone, Trish.” Sam stood and began backing out of the room.

  “I knew it. She’s in Timmins, isn’t she?”

  “Yes.”

  “You want me out of here so she can move in, don’t you?”

  “No. That’s not it at all.” Sam crossed her arms in irritation and leaned on the wall near the hallway. “She’s a forester. Her life is up north.”

  “Well how’s that going to work?” Trish straightened. “I can’t see you quitting your job and moving up into the boonies.”

  “It’s complicated right now, but I’m hoping we’ll find a way to make things work.” Sam closed her eyes. This conversation was going nowhere. “Look, Trish, I’m exhausted and need to get some sleep.” She turned away, rushing back to her room. Her flashing phone indicated a new message.

  “Hey Sam. I was hoping we’d connect tonight. I’m heading to bed shortly so maybe we can try again tomorrow. Have a good night.”

  Sam fired off a text to see if Jo was still awake. No reply.

  “Damn.” Sam kissed her phone and retreated under the covers, not daring to call back and wake Jo, especially since she herself was exhausted. Sleep soon came and lasted all night long.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Wind whipped against Jo’s back as she bent to fasten her snowshoe bindings. Her truck was nudged up against the snowbank and Mollie was already amongst the trees. They were back where it all started, just over three weeks before. Jo had a few more ground sampling tasks to finalize the data inventory report—at least, that’s what she told herself was the reason for returning to the bush near Sam’s cottage.

  In truth, she wanted to see the cottage again, make sure everything was intact, and feel closer to Sam by being next to something that belonged to her. The wind died down once Jo got into the forest, and the walk was pleasant.

  Her heart fluttered with thoughts of Sam making cedar kindling in her woodshed, Mollie by her side, and then what happened afterward. Jo had lost all control, consumed by a passion that took her by surprise and ignited a raging orgasm that still fanned glowing embers whenever she remembered. It was as though Sam had some kind of spell over her.

  She played phone tag with Sam again this morning, both rushing off to work and promising to connect that evening. Jo could hardly wait.

  Mollie remembered the trail and was out on Button Lake before Jo. The deep freeze of the last few weeks ensured the ice was thick, so Jo walked on it toward Sam’s cottage. Her cell rang halfway across the lake.

  “Have you reconsidered?” Anna said. “I’m just about to book and want to know if I should get two or three tickets.”

  Jo watched Mollie sniff in front of Sam’s cottage, bounding in and out of snowdrifts as she explored near the empty cabin. “Just book for you and Mom.”

  Anna sighed. “Oh, come on, Jo. You’ll be moping around here by yourself and Mom really wants you to come.”

  “I won’t have time for any moping and besides, I probably have to go to Toronto tomorrow.” Jo had been given the heads-up she might be asked to attend an ad hoc meeting with political officials regarding the forest management plan.

  “Toronto? For how long?”

  “Just the day, unless I can get Robert to look after Mollie.” Jo’s stomach twirled with excitement and anxiety at the prospect of seeing Sam.

  “You never said anything about that last night.”

  Jo was anxious to tell Sam, but was going to wait until the trip was confirmed. “I just found out this morning. They’ll tell me this afternoon whether or not the meeting is going ahead.”

  “I hope you’re not planning to look up Sam while you’re there.” Anna’s tone was crisp.

  “If I go, it’ll just be a whirlwind trip.” Jo stepped onto Sam’s dock and stared at the small log-sided cottage with its brightly painted yellow window frames. Her heart palpitated. She longed to see smoke coming out of the chimney, Sam inside with a pot of chili bubbling on the stove.

  “I’m going to see if I can put a hold on a ticket for you,” Anna said. “You can think about it while you’re in Toronto and let me know by tomorrow night.”

  “It’s not confirmed yet whether or not I’ll be going to the city.”

  Anna snapped her tongue again. “Oh, if I know you, you’ll be going to Toronto one way or another.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Jo hoped to keep things with Sam private until she felt confident about the possibility of maintaining a relationship.

  “I saw the way you were acting last night at Mom’s. You’re still stuck on her, aren’t you?”

  “I have to go now, Anna. My hands are freezing and my battery’s limited in this cold.”

  “Where are you right now?”

  “In the bush.” Anna would freak if she knew Jo was here, but it was none of her damn business. “I’ll be heading home soon. Talk to you later.”

  Jo approached the woodshed door and propped it open. A small pile of cedar kindling lay on the chopping block, waiting to be brought inside and start a fire. Jo smiled as she fondled the little sticks of wood Sam had made, then shoved them into her pack. She’d bring the kindling to Toronto and maybe use them to start a fire at Sam’s, if things worked out.

  Sam sat in the courtroom and daydreamed about Jo as the jury was being picked. She knew her concentration was off, but also speculated the jury selected would be irrelevant if the charges against their client were stayed, which seemed likely because of improper record-keeping by the charging officer. The drunk driver would walk a free man, imprisoned in his own guilt of knowing a lapse in judgment had killed innocent people. Nobody would see it that way, though. The victims’ family would condemn the culprit, as they had every right to do, and media attention would not be kind. Sam preferred to focus on the positive, like how good she felt with Jo and the possibility of making it more permanent.

  Her application to the position at Maxwell and Associates in Timmins had been assessed and she was asked to attend an interview, but she’d yet to commit to a date. It was impossible for her to leave Toronto now that the trial had started, but the Timmins firm would accommodate her schedule and wait until after the court proceedings to meet.

  Moving so far north to a small place with just over forty thousand people was something Sam could never have imagined doing even three weeks before. Her stomach churned at the prospect of leaving behind her comfortable city life for a woman who could make her both miserable and euphoric in a matter of moments, depending on the mood of her scarred heart. Sam was determined to heal Jo’s heart and harness her own wayward ways so they could have a happy ever after future together. If it had to be in Timmins, then so be it. Jo was worth it.

  Jo received the call at six o’clock that evening informing her of the details of a fast trip to Toronto. Susan, her contact at the Ministry of Natural Resources and Forestry district office, explained that her attendance would be required at a senior management meeting in downtown Toronto the next day. It was set to start at one th
irty on Tuesday afternoon and expected to last for at least three hours, maybe more. The forest management plan was only one item on a long agenda of matters to discuss. Jo would be attending by herself, on behalf of the forest management planning team, and her role was solely to be there as a subject matter expert to answer any questions.

  A flight had been booked for her. It was to leave at eight thirty the next morning and she would be in Toronto by ten. Lunch with Sam would be out of the question because she’d have to make her way into the city, and Sam would be in court. Dinner, however, was a much more likely prospect. Her return flight was booked for eight that evening, but it could be changed for a small fee if she wished to spend the night.

  She lined up Robert to look after Mollie, preparing him to stay until the next Monday morning, as she hoped to spend some time with Sam in Toronto. Jo knew Sam was extremely busy with the trial, but she was prepared to work remotely and keep herself occupied while Sam was in court. This would be like a mini trial on its own, helping Jo determine whether or not a long-distance relationship was feasible.

  Jo needed to have a plan and feel comfortable with the targets. How often they’d see each other, objectives and strategies to make the relationship sustainable over time, a balanced approach to protecting their individual needs, and ground rules to ensure the successful fulfillment of their life together. As complicated as putting together a forest management plan was, Jo knew that the fundamental aspect of ensuring successful implementation was simple. All parties had to take it seriously.

  Her hand trembled as she held the phone to her ear, Sam’s number ringing and voice mail clicking in again. Disappointed at not reaching Sam, her voice clung to the nervous excitement of longing for the woman as she left a short message.

  Sam finally got a moment alone after a long day held prisoner in court. At least that’s how it felt, as she wanted to check her messages more often than possible. She knew there was a new voice mail, but the trip back to her office had been filled with discussions of the day’s proceedings and no chance to listen to it. At seven thirty that evening, she shut her office door and flopped in a chair to give her full attention to the phone.

  “Hey, Sam, I can’t stop thinking about you.” Jo’s words sent shivers up Sam’s spine as the voice mail played. “I hope you’re free tomorrow night because I’m flying to Toronto in the morning for an afternoon meeting.”

  Sam almost dropped her phone.

  “I know you’re busy this week, but I’d really like to see you. It would be great if we could meet for dinner. Call me.”

  “Yes.” Sam shot an arm toward the ceiling then hit redial.

  “Oh my God, Jo, I’m so excited,” she said to Jo’s voice mail. “Let’s do dinner for sure and you can stay at my place. How long are you in town? I can’t wait to hear back.”

  Sam knew she’d skip to the gym, dinner too, and then all the way home as she thought about planning a date with the woman she loved.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  “I’ll meet you in front of the Eaton Centre and we can grab some takeout food before heading to my place.” Sam sounded excited as they made plans over the phone.

  Jo was sitting on her bedroom floor next to Mollie as the dog chewed on a rawhide bone. Her things were already packed. “I can’t believe we’re going to be together tomorrow night.”

  “Me neither. I’m so excited.” Sam giggled. “I’ll drive into the city tomorrow so we can share an intimate ride instead of taking public transit to my house.”

  “Sounds like a plan.” Jo massaged Mollie’s back. “We can keep in touch over the day. There’s no pressure to rush to meet me by a certain time. I can always shop.”

  “And what are you shopping for?”

  “Nothing in particular.” Jo tossed a tissue toward her garbage bin, silently cheering as it went in. “It’s just to kill time. I already know what I want. I’m not interested in picking up anything else.”

  “A woman who knows what she wants. I’m so turned on. I wish you were here with me right now.”

  “Me too.” Jo’s groin throbbed as she thought of touching Sam, and Sam touching her. “We both need to get some sleep tonight so we’re well rested for our evening together.”

  “Evening? I’m thinking nights. I hope you can stay for the weekend.”

  “Have you already forgotten about Mollie?” Jo tapped the golden fur. “I can’t just abandon her.”

  “I guess not. I hope you can at least organize to stay the night.”

  “I’ll see what I can do.” Jo stood up to look out the window. A fine snow was falling as headlights approached. “My nephew Robert just pulled into the driveway. I’m hoping to convince him to stay with Mollie until Monday morning. If that’s okay with you.”

  “Are you kidding me?” Sam squealed. “I’m going to explode with excitement. It’ll be so much fun. I’ll be your personal tour guide and show you around the city on the weekend. Think about what you want to do, and we can go from there.”

  “I want to do you.”

  “Do me now, over the phone.”

  “Patience, Sam.” Jo laughed. “I have to go. My nephew’s at the door and it wouldn’t be appropriate for us to continue this conversation. Get lots of sleep tonight and I’ll let you know when I land in your city tomorrow morning.”

  “You rest up too,” Sam said, “because when I’m finished with you, walking in those snowshoes of yours is going to be next to impossible for at least a week.”

  Jo ended the call just as she swung the door open to greet Robert and his cologne.

  “Hey, come on in. Thanks for coming over on such short notice.” Jo gave him a hug as he stepped inside, his black parka cold against her cheek.

  He bent over to untie his boots. “Mom was hoping you’d change your mind about the Dominican. She made sure I’m available to stay here next week. Hey, Mollie, how’s my girl?” Mollie’s tail whacked against the wall as he rubbed her shoulders.

  “I hope you can stay tomorrow night and through the weekend. I’m off to Toronto in the morning.” Jo hummed inside as she hung up his jacket, the cedar scent in the closet reminding her of the kindling.

  “She told me you might have to go to Toronto. Work stuff?”

  “Sort of.” Jo contemplated confiding in her nephew, knowing he could keep a secret. “What can I get you to drink?”

  “Nothing for now, thanks.” Robert looked in the living room. “Wow, you sure did a number on the floor. What happened?”

  “Let’s just say it was time to renovate.” Jo pushed past him and plopped onto the couch. “I’ll lay the reclaimed oak flooring once I get back.”

  “Back from Toronto or the Dominican?” Robert sat down beside her.

  “Toronto.”

  “You’re going to see Sam, aren’t you?” Mollie’s head landed in his lap and he massaged her ears.

  “Yes.” Jo sighed, resenting feeling like she’d just admitted to doing something wrong. “But I really do have to attend a meeting about the forest management plan. It’s only for tomorrow afternoon, but I’m hoping to stay with Sam until Monday morning.” She stared at a print of a peregrine falcon on her living room wall, nervous about what the next few days might bring. “I just have to follow this through, Robert, and see whether there’s any hope for us.”

  He continued to rub Mollie, her collar clinking every now and then. “Mom and Grandma are so afraid you might move to Toronto.”

  “My life is here. Sam knows that.” Jo figured they’d been talking about her. The sudden holiday south was a ploy to get her away to refresh and forget.

  “And hers is in Toronto, isn’t it? Big-city living with a fancy job and lots of money would be hard to give up. Long-distance relationships can be challenging, even in the best of times.” Both of his hands were on Mollie, vigorously massaging her back. “I know all about that. It’s why I’m single again.”

  Jo was shocked. She hadn’t heard about him dating anyone before this. “Robert,
I wasn’t aware you were seeing someone. Did your mom even know?”

  “No.” His voice sounded a little sad.

  Jo leaned forward. “Why didn’t you tell us? What was her name?”

  Robert shifted, his green eyes meeting Jo’s with a slight grin. “John.”

  Jo sat back, a bit stunned. She brushed a hand across his smooth chin and smiled, a little embarrassed about the assumption. “Welcome to the club.” She gave him a high-five, their palms slapping together. “You’d think I of all people in this family would be more careful before making assumptions like that.”

  “Not necessarily.” Robert smiled. “Presuming someone is gay can be a lot more risky than letting on they’re hetero. A few years ago, I would have died if anyone in the family insinuated I was gay.”

  “Well, I think it’s great. I’m so happy you told me.” Jo leaned over and gave him a heartfelt hug.

  He ran a hand through his neatly coiffed light brown hair. “Please keep this to yourself for now. I’m just not ready for Mom to know yet. I think she’ll be so disappointed.”

  “Robert, I know your mom just wants you to be happy.” Jo squeezed his knee, pleased he trusted her enough to out himself at this point. “Of course I’ll keep this to myself. It’s your news to share and you’ll know when it’s the right time to tell your mom. Just like I know you’ll keep my meeting with Sam secret. Deal?”

  “Deal.” He leaned back in the couch and let out a sigh. “Thanks, Aunt Jo. That felt good to tell you, and now I have a confidant in the family.”

  “Me too.” Jo smiled, so happy to now have someone to talk to about Sam.

  “Now tell me what’s up with her. Are you in love?” Robert put his arms behind his head.

  “Oh Rob, I have indeed fallen in love with her.” Jo flopped her head back into a cushion and moaned with excitement. “What am I going to do?”

  “Does she love you?”